THE ANVIL

Transmissions from the alternate universe

About

Do not attempt to adjust your Internet. We are controlling the transmission.

 
The Anvil is a news organization that tells the stories the mainstream fake media don’t want you to read.
 
Note:  If you are shopping for a heavy iron thingie so you can hand hammer swords at your metal forge, you’re way in the wrong place. 
 
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Disclaimer for the sensitive or litigious… this site is satirical. None of these things happened, and the quotes are fabricated.

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Comments are encouraged, welcome, and the fuel that drives us to continue posting. You don’t have to be funny to be appreciated. Feel free to point out typos, tell us we’re lame, or admire our bizarre pop-culture references.

All stories are written by Eric J Baker (don’t tell the others they aren’t real… we don’t need another existentialist crisis on our hands), copyright 2011 or whatever date appears on it. Unless, when I clicked on that “terms of service” thing with the blog host, it said they own it. Damn them all to hell if that’s the case.

Photos on my Staff page taken by Ethan B Weinrib, a real person using a fake name.

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23 Responses to “About”

  1. jeanie said

    sh1t, this is a great fvcking blog.
    -sister mary grace

  2. Moosey D said

    Dear ‘The Onion’,

    Please cancel my subscription.

  3. Rob said

    Perhaps we can find some water.

  4. Awesome blog.

  5. josh1340 said

    Great blog. Your posts had me rolling. The snuggling dinosaurs sent me into a laughing fit before even reading the article. Keep it up!
    -Josh
    The Good Twin
    http://thegoodtwin.net

  6. Will said

    Great blog. Thanks for your comment on mine and all the lulz to be found here.

  7. postadaychallenge2011 said

    Today is day one of following you as you made a comment on my blog. Every one needs humor in their day. I am “like minded” as you. I am so excited to find you, thanks.

    • Thanks for stopping by, and here’s to future exchanges of comments and reads.

      **Raises glass of water w/a teaspoon of organic apple cider vinegar**

      (Seriously, I’m drinking vinegar. I get my blog ideas from the ensuing hallucinations)

      • postadaychallenge2011 said

        I love apple cider vinegar! Many cures for that remedy. Here’s to you and here’s to me, here’s to psycho battle, I will blog it as long as you and not a moment after.

        • Truth be told, with apple cider vinegar, you don’t get to enjoy the loss of bone density and the digestive problems you get from prescription meds. Oh well. Not everything can have horrible side effects.

  8. The Anvil is more real news than the real news.

  9. Dunno why I’m perusing your pages today. . .it must mean that hell has frozen over or something else akin to the fact that there is nothing better to do. Anyway, “About” reminds me of what one of my sons said to me one day (when he was in high school). I had just purchased and was wearing a tee shirt made by “Guess?” that had emblazoned across the front of it, “GUESS?” My son looked at me thoughtfully and then said, “Oh, about 300 pounds?”

    And some people wonder why mothers eat their own young. (How do they think we get to weigh 300 bs.?)

    • Ahahaha! Your son and I are kindred spirits, apparently.

      I’m sorry that you have been reduced to reading The Anvil. Which leads me to say, “What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?”

  10. BURN IN HELL BAKER, WITH YOUR PRECIOUS 300,000,000 VIEWERS. WHICH YOU STOLE FROM WEIRD DUDE FAKE NEWS.

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